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Wisdom: If you find yourself reading through SHIT tweets on Twitter always remember to make tacos

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2020-02-10

Wisdom: If you find yourself reading through SHIT tweets on Twitter always remember no one loves you Dave

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2020-02-10

I foresee this half an hour containing no bird shits because of reasons...

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2020-02-10

Wisdom: If you find yourself being fingered always remember Burger King is only a bus-ride away

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2020-02-10

Wisdom: If you find yourself looking up always remember to SELL SELL SELL!

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2020-02-09

Wisdom: If you find yourself peeing alone always remember to try harder

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2020-02-09

I foresee this year containing no toilet tigers because of a hole in my neighbor's roof

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2020-02-09

Wisdom: If you find yourself with no friends always remember to SELL SELL SELL!

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2020-02-09

Wisdom: If you find yourself with a banana in your ear always remember to realize you suck

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2020-02-09

Wisdom: If you find yourself looking up always remember to try harder

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2020-02-09

Wisdom: If you find yourself feeling good about life always remember to try harder

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2020-02-08

Wisdom: If you find yourself looking up always remember to make tacos

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2020-02-08

I foresee this month containing some midgets because of cha cha dancers

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2020-02-07

Wisdom: If you find yourself being fingered always remember no one loves you Dave

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2020-02-07

I foresee this hour containing too few papayas because of a hat that wears a smaller hat as its hat

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2020-02-07

I foresee this hour containing 4730297812094.4738902709734.9.0 bird shits because of cha cha dancers

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2020-02-07

I foresee this year containing some pencil erasers because of cha cha dancers

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2020-02-06

Wisdom: If you find yourself with dandruff always remember to try harder

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2020-02-06

Wisdom: If you find yourself with an empty fridge always remember to realize you suck

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2020-02-06

Wisdom: If you find yourself with dandruff always remember reading gay motivational posts online won't make you a better person.

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2020-02-06