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"Mission Accomplished, Jack. Time to get out of Afghanistan."
"But you didn't do anything! And the Talibans are winning!"
"Come on, give me a break man."
"NOOOOOO Gigachad what do you mean you're committing suicide by cop?! Stop this madness!"
"No I said 'suicide by coup'. I am installing a new government that will put me against the wall."
"What?"
"I walk willingly to the altar of the Revolution!"