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Me, seeing a tweet: "Oh, haha, that's a good twe-"
*notices the zoo symbol in the bio of the poster*
Me:
I was addicted to porn for 9 years.
When I say porn ruins young men's lives, I speak from experience.
This is what it did to my life:
(Porn addict physiognomy vs sober chad physiognomy, 4-year difference)
POV: You've just asked James Hendricks III to pay $8 a month to keep his Twitter checkmark.
Don't you dare challenge my allegiance to Aaron, you... sexy beast😳
Ladies (all three of you) and gentlemen, I present to you:
LION TIDDY.
Me when I get some annoying shit in my mentions: