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little rictor looking at that gun and fearing that that was his future and now each day he's more strong and powerful 🥺
to protect, to help but still he felt like he is still using violence. he has come a long way. he was angry for a long time bc he knew his struggles and efforts to be himself were big part bc of how he was raised. he hated what they did to him but he is much better now at least.
yes. he sees all the toxic masculinity he was taught. how much bully he probably endured from his cousins and uncles and own father bc he didn't want to fight and rather read to escape his difficult reality/his real dad. he didn't want to be a fighter and yet he became one (+)
the resentment rictor feels towards his family for all the trauma and abuse they inflicted on him bc they were trying to "make him a man" it's so sad. his father literally took him to see how "respected" and powerful he was so he learned to be like him. a violent corrupt man. (+)
#xspoilers jordan saying apocalypse was "projecting rictor" when rachel was inside his mind without his permission, (it was an invasion of her) imo it confirms what i said in that comment leah liked. he didn't plan it/want it, but ric got inside his mind (heart?). he's vulnerable