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Her: All that salt’s gonna dry you up.
Him: I will literally throw shade at you.
Her: My worst fear. Tiny overcast.
Bwoodle of the Day thanks to the Tumblr anon who has been sending me cheesy jokes for years. #beringandwells
They think I’m joking when I tell them I’m retiring at 43. But I’m not giving another twenty years of my life to people who won’t even let me mind my business. 💁🏾♀️
We’re manifesting a career in doing the creative things I actually love to do.
Happy one year closer to that. 🤣🎉
Happy birthday to my birthday twin, Joanne Kelly, who is living her best life having never tweeted a single twat.