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It only took bells or an #expanse of snow to set off Ed the Elf’s #Christougenniatikophobia. Memories haunted him, like that time he mixed up the naughty & nice lists.
“Santa! Help!” wrote his son.
The bottle of “Xmas spirit” Santa sent worked a treat. #vss365 #vsschristmas
“Hello,” says my teacher at parents’ evening.
“Is it me you’re looking for?” replies my Dad.
Think your parents are embarrassing? My Dad only speaks in 80s song lyrics.
There’s no point telling him to “stop.” His response is always the same:
“#Collaborate & listen.”
#vss365
I thought my secretary’s #chat would kill me, not save me.
He was disguised as a repair man. He #bound me to the office radiator, then went to get tools.
Took him so long to get past Ava, I had time to escape.
He killed Ava instead. I won’t miss the chatter. #vss365 #vssmurder