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Don't forget to brush your teeth and cry before going to bed
Brain: break it Me: why? Brain: it’s none of your business just do it
Dog: *barks* Me: barking back Dog: damn that's deep
You came home sober
an idea an experience a hard work a shit
Start your day with the fucking facial swelling Thank God for another day with a hobo face
for the most luxurious slut
Me: "Time for a vet" My cat:
If a fish smoke, would he smoke like this or that
How to reduce family budget costs