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Even if the weather makes your Human reluctant to go for a walk meeting other Humans will do him good
When their Human is away, you will often find your Human pining at the front door
There is nothing sad about dressing up as each other for #Halloween, nothing sad at all ...
Next time your Human complains about your hairs on the sofa, take him to where he trims his beard
“That’s good, now write the captions as if it's me talking,
and everyone will believe that I dictate them to you”
Monitor your Human when he is using the internet he may be looking at pictures of Cats
On a Monday your Human may be glum, try not to reveal how bad you feel about them going to work
All Dogs go to heaven, where they wait patiently for their Human to turn up with some poo-bags