𝕮𝖚𝖗𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘 𝙵𝔬𝔯𝔤𝔬𝔱𝔱𝔢𝔫 ࠋ𐍈𐍂𐌴さんのイラストまとめ

In Rangoon in the heat of noon in 1874, degenerate gambler & defrocked druid, “Lucky” Jim Wymble, stole a dried monkey paw from Hanuman’s shrine, believing the charm would aid in gambling.
That evening, an old Fakir accurately foretold that Jim would not live to regret the theft.

In Mediaeval Europe complimentary medicine often provided the only available emergency first aid & was frequently used to treat battlefield injuries.
However knowledge of acupuncture principles was still in its infancy & cast iron needles were still often a tad on the thick side.

In Victorian Britain parents were obliged to provide a dowry for each daughter when they wed.
For those with many daughters this could be extremely costly.
To save money many parents opted for
‘Elective Conjoining’ which allowed them to get rid of two girls for the price of one.

In 1943 with Nazi forces across the English Channel in occupied France, boffins at MI5 developed a network of canine lookouts to watch the UK coastline for signs of German invasion, then radio a report to HQ.
The most famous operative was Rover of Dover who saved Britain 7 times.

In the late 19th century, public interest in Complimentary & Alternative Medicine peaked with the vogue for Daemonic Reflexology.

While claiming to offer:

“Physical Healing through Spiritual Heeling”

In reality the Demon Reflexologists attempted to steal their patients’ soles.

In 1868 pioneering dentist & entrepreneur Dr Incisor invented & patented his “Amazing Motorised Dentures”.
The friction-driven engine inside the false-teeth was simultaneously their strongest & weakest feature, as before eating a servant was required to pull the starting cord.

In 1872, Diego Quixote received an invitation to the Masque of the Orange Death.
Believing it was a charity ball for impoverished citrus farmers, he attended & met the petite Senorita del Muerte.
When the guests unmasked at midnight, she was even slimmer than Diego had imagined.

The Mother-of-Toads
Has many abodes
On land & in the water.
On a small moist isle
She made me smile
When she let me wed her daughter.
The wedding night
Was full of delight
At dawn I rose & sought her.
She left me forlorn
For she’d swum off to spawn
& the Heron-God had caught her.

In 1872 brothers & enemies Jacob & Isiah Clumblecrum, elected to settle their dispute over their father’s will via “Trial By Gobblechomping” in which each plaintiff attempts to eat the other (the survivor is judged to have proven the legal merit of their case).

Neither survived.

Hollywood lies to us all the time.

Contrary to popular belief, Abraham Lincoln was not a vampire hunter.

Lincoln became undead in 1861 & secretly sucked the blood of his victims, until the nemesis of the nosferatu, J. W. Booth, shot him with a wooden bullet tipped with garlic.