𝕮𝖚𝖗𝖎𝖔𝖚𝖘 𝙵𝔬𝔯𝔤𝔬𝔱𝔱𝔢𝔫 ࠋ𐍈𐍂𐌴さんのイラストまとめ

Toboggan or not toboggan?
That is the question which has vexed sledders for centuries.
Many fear the risk of crashing into snowbanks.
Yet werechickens are renowned for indulging in such rollicking downhill merriments as both werehens & werecocks enjoy a swift tumble in soft snow.

While human fashions for Christmas Dinner have flitted through the ages from Wild Boar to Goose to Turkey to Nut Roast, the wild dwelling feary faery fairfolk of the hoarfrosted winter hedgerows still favour the flavour of their traditional Yuletide dinner of Fieldmouse venison.

In 1542 the chief Quantum Qabbalist of Prague, the ‘Rabid Rabbi’ Reuben ben Rabinohalfwitz, used both forbidden Druidic secrets & the 13 סְפִירוֹת (Sephiroth of Dyscalculia, brother of Dyzlekzia) to create a Snowgolem.
It massacred 14,673 people before being destroyed with salt.

Throughout the mediaeval period the sentence for those convicted of
“A lack of cheery holiday seasonal rambunctiousness” & “Insufficient holy hollyjollification”, was to be pilloried by a jinglebell jester & force-fed Christmas Pudding until eventual death from merry obesity.

In the comfort of the 21st C. most people forget the terror of Christmas Past, when Polar Bears prowled the land, crushing the unwary in a grim embrace & feasting on their still living prey.
But with melted icecaps forcing wildlife South we can now look forward to this joy again.

In 1107 Earl Aethelstan le Bruce, bannerman to the King, suffered a freak alchemical accident in which his leg was exposed to a dangerously high dose of Gamma Radiation.
Angered by this irritating incident he was shocked to discover his leg began to turn green & mutate hulkishly.

Death is often portrayed as a being of anthropomorphised evil, yet in reality he is a considerate entity who does his best to preserve the dignity of his clientele.

Knowing the effect his appearance has on the bowels of surprised clients, he always brings plenty of toilet paper.

In 1437 a nun captured the ghost of an oracular merwerepig which was accused of heresy due to its prophecy that one day Jesus would return as a Syrian refugee child & the world would be judged by how she was treated.

The ghostly merwerepig was burnt at the stake, with no effect.

Although ballet has a cultured reputation, historians remember its gruesome origin as a sacrificial dance honouring the bloodthirsty Dark Lord of the Danse Macabre.
While most public performances no longer end in death, 1 in 3 ballet schools still have an annual cull of students.

In 1939 the case of the Grapefruit Murders & it’s denouement filled the press.
Mary & Beth Smub were found decapitated in a pile of grapefruits.
This was the 10th double of homicide sisters that year.
Further investigation showed the girls were undead serial insurance fraudsters.